


Like A Watermelon Between Your Thighs

by Oliver_Is_Twisted



Category: Red vs. Blue
Genre: Crack Treated Seriously, F/M, Femdom, Injury, Masochism, Oral Sex, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-12
Updated: 2020-08-12
Packaged: 2021-03-06 02:07:31
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,395
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25855612
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Oliver_Is_Twisted/pseuds/Oliver_Is_Twisted
Summary: York gains a rather interesting head injury. But hey, at least he had fun while doing it.
Relationships: Agent Carolina/Agent York (Red vs. Blue)
Kudos: 7





	Like A Watermelon Between Your Thighs

**Author's Note:**

> I'm sorry for this, but at the same time I'm really not. Have fun!

Carolina storms her way into Yorks quarters, making him jump from where he was sitting on his bed. She's still in full armor, a contrast to York's tee shirt and sweats, and yet through that helmet, he could tell she was glaring.

"Sup Lina? To what do I owe this visit?" He smirks softly, eyes flicking up and down her figure. He mentally tells Delta to power down until he's called for. Delta complies without protest.

The casual language makes her tense up even more. "I was in the middle of training. Tex asked The Director if she could train, and knowing it was my designated time, he agreed. They kicked me out." Her fists are clenched tight at her sides, as though she's seconds from an outburst.

"Alright. Do you need to take that rage out on someone, or help to calm down?" He asks, still remaining casual. The tense stance and her armor made her look intimidating as hell. He loves it.

She walks up to him, towering above. "I want to take it out while sparring her. But, if you're my only option, then I want both." Then, she swings a leg over him to straddle his lap.

"Will do." He responds, unable to help a single roll of his hips into her codpiece.

"Really? Already?" She chuckles without any humor behind it. "Sometimes I think you're more attracted to my armor than you are to me."

His arms link casually behind her head. "You know that's not it, 'Lina. It's just… when you're in your armor and I'm not, I know for a fact I couldn't hold my own against you. Like, even out of armor you'd wipe the floor with me, but I could put up a fight. Right now, I can't. It's hot." He blushes a little as he confesses, glancing away from the piercing gaze of her visor.

"Is it now? Hmm… what if I didn't take this off tonight?" Her helmet tilts, and she looks him up and down. He whimpers.

"P-please. I'd love that, yeah. Just maybe remove the thigh plating. And the codpiece, of course. But yeah…" his hips roll up again. It's not exactly the most comfortable thing to rub against, but he's getting too excited too quickly to care.

"Don't even want the helmet off?" She questions, leaning in closer, adjusting her stance so he can't get any stimulus. He whines again, leaning back. She shoves at his shoulder, pushing it hard into the mattress.

He's staring up into her emotionless visor, and he loves how cold and inhuman it makes her look. But at the same time, he loves to see the faces she makes, and the way her hair looks when messed up and out of its ponytail. "Uhh, your call? You choose if it stays on or comes off."

She seems to think it over for a bit, then pulls it off. "It would get too uncomfortable. Maybe another time." She pulls her hair tie out, and that long red hair cascades down. She shakes her head to get it into place, and he feels his heart swell a bit. He tries to lean up to kiss her, but she shoves him back down.

She pulls off her codpiece, then the thigh plates. She then looks him up and down while undoing the kevlar between her legs. The hole is there so the wearer can go to the bathroom without taking it all off, but of course, it's used for quickies all the time.

York moans under his breath, staring at those powerful thighs wrapped in kevlar, the trimmed patch of hair that's been exposed, and her entrance. "God, you're so beautiful." He whispers reverently.

"Is that so?" She asks but doesn't give him the chance to respond. Instead, she occupies his mouth by grinding her cunt against his closed lips. He gets the message loud and clear, arms moving to grip her thighs and tongue pressing hard and flat against her. 

She hums pleasantly at the pressure but rolls her hips expectantly. He obediently parts her folds and licks at her entrance, nosing at her clit gently. She pushes down again, gripping his hair tight enough to hurt. He moans and slips his tongue inside, and immediately her hips are rolling in circles.

It seems she wants to control the motions, so he just follows every silent order. He glances up at her and moans loud enough for her to feel the vibration and moan with him. Strong and powerful in her armor, yet trembling and panting, the contrast of bright red hair and aqua armor is breathtaking.

She picks up the pace, and he's having trouble ignoring the throbbing in his sweats. He squeezes her thighs tighter, making sure his hands stay in place. He is not going to touch himself. He wants her to reward him for being patient, so he waits. She could switch from riding his face to riding his dick, she could peg him, or if she was truly tired she could just return the favor by sucking him off. No matter what, finishing with her help is much better than coming now. He likes the buildup and desperation.

Both her hands are in his hair tugging harshly, and her hips are working as fast as they can. But she's started growling in frustration, gritting her teeth and glaring at the ceiling. She needs more, she needs faster, but her muscles were getting sorer by the second.

"Let's switch." She grits out, lifting off and replacing his tongue with two fingers, fucking herself fast. He slides out from underneath and she falls onto her back, and then his tongue was back where it belonged as her thighs gripped his head hard enough to hurt. Hurt so good he was moaning into her and grinding down into the mattress. 

York forces his hips up, ass in the air. Hands tugging at his hair and thighs squeezing his face keeping him in place as his tongue fucks her. He starts using his nose on her clit and she gets even louder, grip even tighter.

When he realizes he couldn't escape even if he wanted to, it makes his dick throb so hard he's scared he'll come then and there. When he was a teen, he watched way too many videos of people crushing watermelons between their thighs. The idea of becoming that watermelon got him much more excited than it should, considering it would kill him. But glancing up at her washes all his worries away.

"I'm close. Fuck, York, don't you Dare stop. I'll kill you if you stop." She's thrusting down on him, and he doubles his efforts, doing everything he can to make her cum. Ow, fuck, he's going to have a headache later today, but it's gonna be so, so worth it. 

The last thing he knows is her climactic scream, intense pain on each side of his head, and his involuntary orgasm.

"York?" She manages to pant out after a minute. He had just… gone limp. Maybe he came and passed out. Carolina props up on her elbows, nudging him with a thigh. "York!"

She chuckles to herself, sitting up fully to shake him. He doesn't respond. The sides of his face were bruised, purple already. Blood was dripping out of his mouth. "YORK!!" She screams, shaking him with more urgency. "DELTA!"

Delta appears, looking over the two of them with startled confusion. Then, he starts rapidly flashing red. "Agent York's skull and jaw have been fractured. He has internal bleeding. He needs to get to medbay immediately."

Carolina snatches up her helmet. "Emergency in York's quarters, I need a doctor Asap." She hurriedly clicks the rest of her armor into place, then decides that waiting for a doctor was a waste of time and moves to carry him.

"I would not move him. The blood could flood his brain and cause an aneurysm." Delta warns. "Wait for medical personnel."

She takes a step back, feeling panic rise up. "What can I do?"

"Wait."

"Goddamn it, Delta!" She shouts, unable to stop the fear and thickness of her throat from being audible. 

The doctors arrive. She tells them they were sparring, and they take him away, Delta prattling off the specifics of the injury. She wants to trail after them, but at the same time… she falls to sit on the bed, helmet in her hands, embarrassed, tired, angry, and guilty.

York feels… heavy. Everything is blurry and bright. Blinking a few times fixes it, for the most part, remembering that the left side doesn't work still.

"Oh my gosh, he's up." A voice says, obviously struggling to keep quiet though they want to yell. Excitement and nerves blended together.

"I can tell. Go get 'Lina" Says another one, soft and comforting, torn between anxiety and relief, seriousness and humor. 

"Agent York is returning to consciousness slowly. He is confused." A voice with a digital sound to it, just as soft but not so conflicted. Subtly nervous though. That makes him smile.

"Did I make you worried, D?" York mumbles, looking up at the glowing green hologram floating above his chest.

"Agent York!" Delta seems startled, despite his usual emotionless act. "I… I'm glad to see you have returned to consciousness. That is all."

"Glad to know you care." He smiles, gazes shifting around the room. He remembered North telling Wash to go get Carolina, and now the only people here are doctors, Delta, and North.

North smiles down at him, half relieved and half taunting. "Carolina says the two of you were wrestling in your quarters, on your bed, and she fractured your skull and jaw with her thighs in a headlock. Any truth to that story?" North's tone shows he doesn't believe they were fighting, and York has half a mind to facepalm at Carolina's cover story. She's never been a good liar. The only reason he doesn't facepalm is that he knows it'll fucking hurt.

"Yea, there's truth. All I gotta say is that it was worth it." York smiles, remembering just how good it had all felt.

"I do not believe that is all you have to say, Agent York." A deceptively gentle voice calls from the door. The Councilor. Fuck. Footsteps approach the bed, and that neutral but gentle face is above him. He knows it's a facade, his presence making him tense up more than it calms him down. Delta and North seem to feel the same way.

"Hey, Councilor. Sup?" Delta's hologram disappears, slipping into York's head to make sure he has the facts straight, showing him all the details Carolina provided. Delta doesn't like to lie to The Councilor or The Director, but having a relationship could get York and Carolina both fired. That would also mean Delta moves to a new host, which he does not want. So, he helps York lie.

"What were you and Agent Carolina doing when she injured you?" The counselor asks with a tilt of the head.

"We were sparring. Wrestling." York lies. "She was upset about her training time being cut short. I had the idea that we should learn how to fight someone in armor, in case we don't have access to our own. First fight I was the one without armor since I was already dressed dowm. She got me in a headlock and I couldn't tap out in time."

"Is that so?" He asks, giving the distinct impression that he doesn't believe him.

"Yep."

"Your story lines up with Carolina's, I will give you that. North, did you tell him this?"

"No sir." North also knows this could get the two of them fired. "I told him Carolina said they were wrestling, but that's it." The counselor nods.

"Delta, did you tell him to say this?" The counselor asks.

"No sir, I did not. I have not given him any new information." This was not technically a lie. The information Carolina told the counselor wasn't exactly new. 

"I guess he came up with it on his own then. Rather impressive. I will say there is strong evidence against your claims, York. Have you noticed you are not wearing the clothes you came here in?"

"Uhh…" York looks down. He's in a hospital gown. Fuck. Didn't he cum in his pants? Fuck fuck fuck. "Just now, yea."

"Must I inform you about the evidence we found on your clothing?"

"N-no sir, you don't have to. I think I know what you found." He looks down, blushing hard. This was his own fault really, not hers. She still should have come up with something less obvious though.

North blinks at him a few times, clearing his throat and looking away, blushing. "May I be dismissed, Councilor?"

"You may. I would like to speak with Agent York alone."

"Yes sir." He shoots York an apologetic look and speedwalks away.

"Now York. Under normal circumstances, I would report you and Carolina to the Director immediately for reprimandation. However… I do not believe The Director would react to this incident… in the proper manner." He does seem scared of how the Director would act, and York doesn't blame him. He doesn't know what the relationship between Carolina and The Director is, but it's different.

"So… does that mean we're off the hook?" York asks hopefully.

"Not exactly. This will not be reported, but both of you will move down a rank on the leaderboard, and your training and study time will be increased by several hours, to give you less time and energy for… recreation of that nature. If something like this happens again, know that you will be reported, and The Director will not let you go so easily. For now, the story the two of you told me is the official one." York gulps

"I understand, sir. Thank you." He is very scared of how Carolina will react to being even further away from Texas on the leaderboard. He doesn't care too much about it, but he knows she does. And likewise, she won't care about the extra work, but he definitely will. Their schedules will probably be shifted so they don't see each other often, too. This is gonna suck. But hey, maybe if it pisses Carolina off enough, they could go for round two.


End file.
